The Seven Principles of the M.O.D. Squad
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BALANCE BUDDY WITH ROLE MODEL I will put my daughter’s need for a role model above my desire to be her friend. I will remain aware of the powerful influence that my words-about my daughter, my own body, and others-have in shaping my daughter’s beliefs and attitudes about beauty, fat, appearance, weight, and being female. I am committed to eliminating diet-talk and negative body-talk. |
| 2. | BALANCE PHYSICAL WITH EMOTIONAL NEEDS I will encourage my child to honor the wisdom of her body by helping her differentiate the needs of her stomach from the needs of her heart. I will help her respect her body’s hunger and fullness signals and I will teach her through my words and deeds healthy, effective ways to cope with difficult feelings. |
| 3. | BALANCE HEALTH WITH FLEXIBILITY I will help my daughter make food choices based on sound nutrition mixed with a healthy dose of flexibility. I will show her that being active is a fun way to stay fit, strong and happy and is neither the road to thinness nor punishment for the sin of eating. Perfectionism and rigidity are the problem, not the solution. |
| 4. | BALANCE BODY-IMAGE WITH SELF-IMAGE I will help my daughter develop a positive body image based on an appreciation for what her body does for her rather than how it looks. I will help her appreciate the changes that occur as her body grows. I will also help her develop her self-image based on internal qualities, where body image plays a minor role. |
| 5. | BALANCE EMPATHY WITH ASSERTIVENESS I will help my daughter develop a mindful appreciation for her own needs and feelings as well as empathy for others. I will encourage her to speak up when her boundaries or those of others are violated or she senses injustice in the world. |
| 6. | BALANCE SAFETY WITH CONTROL While mindful of her need for safety, I will give her age-appropriate opportunities to make decisions and to deal with the consequences of these decisions. Even when her ideas, tastes and preferences are different than mine I will support her decisions so that she feels a sense of “control” over her destiny. |
| 7. | BALANCE ENJOYMENT OF MEDIA WITH A CRITICAL EYE While recognizing the fun aspects of the media, I will teach her to view media critically, being especially aware of messages promoting intolerance, materialism, sexism, weightism, violence against or the objectification of women and the sexualization of children. I will promote systemic change by speaking out (writing letters, e-mails or taking other actions) when companies demean or objectify women and children. |
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The M.O.D. Squad The Backstory As Dina’s sons entered grade school, she started to hear alarming stories from moms of young girls; an 8-year-old was in tears because her friends wouldn’t eat the cake at her birthday party; a 3-year-old wouldn’t put on her winter coat “because it made her look fat.” Dina suspected that some mothers, caught up in their own struggles with food and dieting, might be inadvertently sending the wrong messages to their kids. She thought about the skills she was teaching her teen and adult clients in therapy and wondered how she might help moms teach these skills to young girls. She recalled the playgroup she attended when her sons were babies and the wisdom she gained from other moms. Realizing that busy moms of grade schoolers might be disconnecting from other moms, she set out to create a forum for moms to share insight, wisdom and support: The M.O.D. Squad (for Moms Of Daughters) was born! About The M.O.D. Squad Workbook Based on seven principles for raising healthy girls, Dina wrote the M.O.D. Squad Workbook to help moms prevent their daughters from developing the problems she was encountering in her therapy clients. The M.O.D. Squad Workbook provides a useful guideline for groups of moms (dads, too!) to discuss and explore the factors that can contribute to eating and body image problems in kids. The discussion questions in the M.O.D. Squad Workbook gently encourage moms to examine their attitudes and behaviors so that they can be positive role models for their children. It explores how we talk about “fat;” attitudes about food, dieting, and exercise; issues of control and perfectionism, as well as how to moderate the negative impact of peers and the culture through assertiveness, media literacy and activism. Homework, handouts and suggestions for mother-daughter activities help reinforce key messages. If you are interested in starting a M.O.D. Squad group in your area, contact www.MyEdin.org. |
